I have enough energy left in me for one more post.
I know myself best, that much is clear.
And look, I know what relationship I want.
And minus this fundamental issue we have, I am happy. This is what I want.
It is a make or break issue, but I am willing to and I want to try.
That’s just who I am.
I will very likely be left behind in the end.
But I would rather try.
Not for the sake of others but for myself.
Before I am just done with love for good.
For now though.
I am just done with humans. Everyone means well. Can I just choose the care I need. I don’t like dealing. I just always have to because it’s the right thing and I will get to it.
I am done with people, with individuals of any sort. If they’re not here to make me feel better, they can go and wait.
I’m just..everyone is so eager to solve the damn problem now.
LOOK THERE ARE ONLY SO FUCKING MANY OPTIONS.
Can we deal with my emotions first?
Of course, no one gives a fuck about that.
Can we talk about PRESENT ME and what PRESENT ME needs and tell me about how to prevent future me from being like past me later?
I am sick of appreciating.
I just want what I want but I can’t have okay.
End of story.
Because fucking hell love and care is too much to ask for.